The 10 Commandments of Apartment Review Sites

So part of the moving process is figuring out the whole apartment hunting thing. My new job was awesome enough to give us transitional housing on campus, but as the space we're currently occupying is very small, we're hoping to get out of it and into a permanent place sooner, rather than later.

Searching for apartments is a little frustrating. I've only done it one other time in my life, and that's when I was entering grad school, and my parents helped, so I don't really remember much of the process. Aside from that, I've had on-campus positions where you don't really chose anything, except for maybe the color of the paint on your walls - they do all the choosing for you. So this has been a new experience for me, and even though Will has had more experience than me with it, it's been a few years since he's had to apartment hunt as well.

Looking at online review sites is incredibly frustrating since it seems like the only people who post on them tend to be the ones who are PISSED OFF at their current place.

1. If you write your review in all caps, I will ignore it completely.
2. Same if you don't capitalize at all. I understand it's a stylistic choice, but an apartment review website is not the place for it.
   
3. If you give someone 1 star based solely on your apartment tour, I will ignore you.
4. If you're complaining about it costing too much, and you knew how much it cost when you signed on, you're being a bit ridiculous.
   
5. I have spent the past 5 years dealing with students who complain about things being broken and not getting fixed who didn't tell anyone that they were broken. Don't do the same, and then whine about it in a review site.
   
6. If their policies are clearly posted about late rent, and you turn in your rent late, don't complain about that either.
7. Same with any other policies, including trash, cleaning up dog poo, and loud parties.
   
8. If you score your place with 5 stars, I'm going to look at it with a keen eye. It looks very suspicious if everyone else hates it and you're the only 5. I won't discount your opinion entirely, but I will take it with a grain of salt.
9. If you're racist or bigoted in any way, I will discount your opinion as invalid.
10. If you write about animal sacrifices, hooded figures, and ghost midgets, I will mock you openly.